Some places have come up with human milk banks. This is fine with non Muslims. For Muslim babies, mothers and families, this is a No! No!. Why? Because there is a statement about what happens when a lactating mother decides to breastfeed a baby which is not hers. There are rules about being a wet nurse. Also, there are the issues of relationships and what is lawful/unlawful when a baby that was nursed by someone from outside the family circle.
Why are there strict rules about breastfeeding babies who have no blood relations to the babies they nursed? Scientists don't know. Western doctors don't know what happens. Muslim doctors would know because they have been taught what happens when you breastfeed a baby that is not yours.
Let us study the issues re breastfeeding. I have written the following issues as a Muslim mother because there is no medical text that explains this in detail.
- Muslim mothers breastfeed their newborns for 2 years (24 months) or until a time that's to be decided by the baby's parents. Breastfeeding is a mutual affair; the father must know.
- Many mothers don't know how to breastfeed properly and run out of milk before the 2 years are up. Why? They never learnt it properly nor do it correctly.
- When a mother has little milk or can't breastfeed her own newborn, she can hire a wet nurse to breastfeed her newborn but there are issues. These issues concern the fed baby's relationship with the wet nurse and her children. When a wet nurse takes and breastfeed a baby, that babies "becomes her child". She can salam the child any time, even as an adult. The baby is immune and not foreign to her family members. This means, the baby when it grows up and become an adult, he/she can mix around with the wet nurse and her children without worrying about the issues of haram and aurat.
- A mother who fails to breastfeed her newborn is still a mother to her newborn. She is defective only in breastfeeding. She has played her role as a mother. However, the newborn/baby who has never been breastfed suffers from a lot of problems, mainly respiratory conditions for lack of antibodies. Breastfeeding is meant to transfer the mother's antibodies to the newborn baby so that it builds its own immunity. So babies who are not breastfed suffer from poor health due to respiratory conditions - this is bad for the baby.
- Some mother refused to breastfeed their own infants because they think their breasts will sag and never return to being spongy and nice again.
- Ustaz has said that breastmilk from the Human Milk Bank is haram for Muslim babies as the milk is pooled and we don't know the exact source of the milk for the needy baby.
- Muslim mothers must prepare and make their own arrangements if they want a wet nurse to nurse their newborns. The wet nurse must be known to all parties concerned so everybody knows who are those who can legally become like sibs to the nursed infant when he becomes an adult. Children who are nurse together cannot marry each other because they are now considered like sibs even though they are not genetically related. Nurses and doctors must take note that if they are giving pooled milk from the Human Milk Bank to babies under their care, they must also inform the parents or stop it altogether as it is an offence to give pooled human milk to Muslim babies.
- In today's Human Milk Bank programs, the mother remains anonymous and the recipient baby also remains anonymous. This is not right in Islam and for Muslims.
- Babies who are nursed together by the same wet nurse cannot marry as they are considered as sibs. Sibs cannot marry each other as this is incest! Incest is not allowed in any religion.
- Western doctors and nurses do not understand the issues of wet nurse in modern medicine and therefore are not in a position to advise their patients. They will need to learn from the Muslim doctors and wet nurses so they understand the issues and know how to advise their patients accordingly. We have so many genetic disorders today and yet we choose to overlook the problems and issues re infant breastfeeding. That's why we have many children and adults today who have social behaviour problems.
- We should not have a pooled Human Milk Bank if the donor name & contact remain anonymous to the recipient baby, whose parents also don't know the milk donor at all. Would you ever give milk to your own baby if you obtained milk from someone you don't know? Nobody in the right frame of mind would agree to an anonymous milk source. Being anonymous means you cannot find out and will never ever know and therefore run the risk of not being helped if something goes wrong with the milk provided or the baby's development is not up to your expectation. You cannot sue an anonymous person or the hospital that provided you with the anonymous breastmilk.
- Why remain anonymous if you wish to be a wet nurse? It is a noble job to breastfeed a baby. The real issue is why must we make the milk source anonymous? Why have people in charge of the Human Milk Bank chose to make the donor anonymous? Can Chinese breastmilk be given to a white infant? Can an Indian baby consume breastmilk from a Norwegian woman? Can a Jewish newborn receive breastmilk from a Muslim mother? Who can decide on these issues? These are hard issues but they are real.
- What if the mother is a non Muslim and has just taken pork and then expressed her milk for the milk bank? And then you take her milk for your Muslim baby? Is this ok in Islam? No, I don't think so. What if she decides to drink and then donate her breastmilk? Still, I think her breastmilk is not fit for a Muslim newborn; it will take 40 days for the body to clear the alcoholic residues from a drinker's blood circulation.
KEMH PREM Bank
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